This isn’t about us professionals.
This is the most horrible pathology I have ever come across. This evil pathology must stop. I am passionate because there is no way we should be tolerating this pathology for a single day. It is unconscionable that this pathology is tolerated within mental health.
Early on, when I was working with one family the exact nature of the pathology suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks.
Oh my God – one day the targeted parent has a child, and the next day they don’t. It’s as if someone killed their child. The alienating parent is so angry that they are killing – they are murdering – the other person’s children.
“I’m so angry at you for leaving me, I’m going to kill your children.”
Oh my God. That’s the most horrible thing I’ve ever heard. To be so angry at someone that you kill their children to get revenge. That is the most horrible thing I’ve ever heard.
But not only that, the alienating parent is getting the child to be the murderer of the other person’s children. Oh my God, I don’t know which is more horrible, to turn your own child into the murderer of the other person’s children, or to turn the other person’s child into the murderer of the other person’s children.
And then, the alienating parent is also getting the child to kill his or her own mother or father. That’s so incredibly horrible. To get a child to kill his or her own mother. That’s such a horrible-horrible thing to do. To get a child to kill his or her own father. Oh, my God.
This is THE most horrible thing ever. This is evil. Pure evil.
So while I was reading up about personality disorders and attachment trauma, and all that “professional” stuff, I was also reading up about evil. Pure evil. Because this pathology is on the same line as core, fundamental evil.
So as I was reading Kernberg and Millon, I was also reading up about evil, and the research and science surrounding evil:
Baumeister, R.F. (1996). Evil: Inside human cruelty and violence. New York: Freeman/Times/Henry Hold.
One of the interesting things is that evil never sees itself as evil. It actually thinks the other is evil, that the victim is evil. The Nazi’s didn’t see themselves as evil. They thought it was the Jews who were evil.
The alienating parent thinks it’s the targeted parent who is evil.
And then there’s the link between the absence of empathy and evil:
Baron-Cohen, Simon (2011). The Science of Evil: On Empathy and the Origins of Cruelty. New York: Basic Books.
And the link between developmental trauma and the absence of parental empathy.
Moor, A. and Silvern, L. (2006). Identifying pathways linking child abuse to psychological outcome: The mediating role of perceived parental failure of empathy. Journal of Emotional Abuse, 6, 91-112.
“Only insofar as parents fail in their capacity for empathic attunement and responsiveness can they objectify their children, consider them narcissistic extensions of themselves, and abuse them. It is the parents’ view of their children as vehicles for satisfaction of their own needs, accompanied by the simultaneous disregard for those of the child, that make the victimization possible.”
The absence of parental empathy is the origin of inflicting psychological trauma on the child. And inflicting psychological trauma on the child destroys the child’s capacity for empathy. And the absence of empathy is the origin of human cruelty. And the absence of empathy is the origin of evil.
The attachment system is the neurological brain system governing all things love-and-bonding. Empathy is critical in love and bonding, and the absence of empathy is the source of human cruelty and evil. Trauma to the attachment system destroys the capacity for empathy within the attachment system. The origins of evil are in psychological trauma to the attachment system.
The MOST disturbing child symptom is not the suppression of the attachment system, it’s not the delusional disorder, it’s not the haughty and arrogant contempt and scorn. The most disturbing child symptom is the absence of empathy that allows the child to kill this other person’s children.
To the pathological parent: For you to kill another person’s children because you are angry with them is the worst thing I have ever heard. To get a child to exhibit that level of cruelty is beyond the psychological abuse of the child, it is evil.
And then there is the grief of the targeted parent. To have someone kill your children is the worst possible thing ever. The grief bores to the very marrow of one’s being. Oh my God, the grief is so profound and so deep. How can it possibly be endured.
This is the most awful and horrible thing I have ever come across. This is pure evil.
This must stop. Immediately.
I was on my way to writing marvelous books solving parenting and ADHD, but there’s no way I could continue on that path. This evil must stop. Today.
To the pathological parent: You are not allowed to kill someone’s children because you’re angry with them.
But we can’t stop it because… because why?… why can’t we stop this, why doesn’t anyone see it? Stupid, stupid, stupid, these mental health professionals are so incredibly stupid. Don’t they see it? Why don’t they see it? They are colluding with this astounding evil.
That stops. Any mental health professional who colludes with this profound evil does not deserve to be a mental health professional. They do not deserve their license to practice.
How do we pull that stupid, stupid, so incredibly stupid mental health professional’s license? If they are going to collude with this evil, I want to pull their license. They do not deserve to have a license to be a mental health professional.
“I’m angry with you because you rejected me. So I’m going to kill your children.”
And the mental health professional – and I use that term extremely loosely in reference to these people – is colluding in this murder of someone’s children. I want their license revoked.
Can I do that with Gardnerian PAS? No. Okay, then we need something else. Because I want their license revoked if they are going to collude with this astonishingly cruel, this cavalierly cruel murder of someone’s children. If the mental health professional is that incredibly stupid, then they don’t deserve a license to practice in the field of professional psychology. Go be a plumber. Go be a computer technician. Go be an engineer. Go be anything else – but DON’T practice professional psychology. Stay away – stay far, far away from working with children and families.
So what do I need to do to pull their license to practice psychology? We need to able to hold these stupid and incompetent mental health “professionals” ACOUNTABLE. I need to activate professional standards of practice to be able to get their licenses revoked if they are going to be that incredibly incompetent.
Can we revoke their license based on Gardnerian PAS. If we can, I’m totally fine with that. I’d be the biggest fan of Gardnerian PAS ever. If we can’t, then we need to do something else, because I want their license revoked.
“I’m so angry with you because you rejected me, I’m going to murder your children.”
Abhorrent. Evil. Just plain evil. And the mental health “professional” (I might just start putting the word “professional” in quotes regarding these people) is so incredibly stupid, so incredibly incompetent, that they are colluding with the murder of this person’s children, and they are colluding with the profound degree of child abuse that empties the child of human empathy and allows the child to perform such an abhorrent act of human cruelty.
I am disgusted. Viscerally disgusted by these stupid, stupid mental health… people. How do we get their license revoked, these stupid….
If it takes defining this pathology totally within standard and established constructs so we can activate professional standards of practice to revoke their licenses, then let’s do it.
Can we revoke their license – today – not in five years, not in ten years – today – can we revoke their license to practice today? No. Then let’s do something different, because we need to revoke these stupid mental health… people’s licenses today.
You know what… I think I might just stop calling them “professionals” and start calling them “mental health people,” because they don’t deserve the title of being a professional.
So I’m sorry if I’m abrasive. I’m sorry if I’m arrogant. I don’t really care. I don’t want this to continue a single day – a single minute longer than absolutely necessary. I will push, and prod, and drive this as fast as I possibly can. Working late into the evening. Working weekends. Working every spare moment of my time. I want these mental health people’s licenses revoked. Today. Now. They do not deserve a professional license.
And now we’re finally here. Once I got Foundations published, I can now hold them accountable. I’m trying my best to give them fair warning –
I’m coming for your professional license to practice. I’m going to do EVERYTHING in my power to get your professional license revoked.
That is my sole mission, to get your license to practice professional psychology revoked. And I may not be able to do it today, or tomorrow, but I am not going to stop until I get your license to practice revoked – or until you stop colluding with this evil, with this profound human cruelty; with the induced evacuation of the child’s capacity for normal-range empathy that makes them a collaborator to their pathological parent’s astounding act of human cruelty.
I may not be able to get your license revoked today. You may escape me today. But I will not rest until you either stop colluding with this human cruelty, this evil, or I get your license to practice revoked.
So I have no patience for professional discussions about how many angels can dance on the head of a pin or what makes for a “bona fide” expert. The ONLY thing I want is to revoke the professional license of these stupid, stupid mental health… persons – or for them to stop colluding with this evil; with this immense human cruelty.
I’m sorry if I’m a “problem child.” I just want the professional license of these stupid mental health persons revoked, and by God I’m going to do everything in my power to accomplish that. Every ounce of my knowledge, every ounce of my skill, is directed toward one goal – to get their licenses revoked or else for them to stop colluding with this evil.
If we can do it with Gardnerian PAS, I’ll be the biggest fan ever. But we can’t. Then I’ve developed an approach that will allow me to go after them. And I am absolutely going after their licenses. Join me, don’t join me. I don’t care. I am going after their licenses to practice. If you join me and we can end this one day sooner, then I hope you join me. If me being a pigheaded pain-in-the-butt moves this one day faster to getting their licenses to practice revoked, or for them to no longer collude with this cruelty, then I’m going to be a pigheaded pain-in-the-butt.
I want them to STOP colluding with this human cruelty and evil, or I want their license to practice professional psychology revoked, and I will not relent until either one or the other is accomplished.
This immense human cruelty stops. This evil stops. And every ounce of my will is directed toward this purpose.
Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, PSY 18857